Join Kirk and Friends TONIGHT for "What's Your Story?" with Warriors for Life (WFL) Online!
- Col (Ret) Mikel Burroughs
- 10 hours ago
- 5 min read
Come join Volunteer, Peer Support Specialist Kirk Poe for "Awaken Your Inner Healer!" edition of Warriors for Life (WFL) Online, sponsored and presented by Victory for Veterans, Inc. (VFV).
We are asking everyone to share who we are and what support Victory for Veterans provides via WFL. If you know someone who is a veteran, first responder or a family member/caregiver, please ask them to join us for at least one meeting so they can learn more about what we do and how they can share their wisdom with others who may be able to learn from them.
TONIGHT's Topic: "What's Your Story?"
Join Kirk and Friends, TONIGHT and let's get together online for the Warriors for Life (WFL) as we talk about "What's Your Story?"
We are storytelling animals, constantly narrativising our existence.
Humans are fundamentally "storytelling animals" or homo fictus, driven by an inherent, often subconscious, need to narrativize existence,, shaping their reality, memories, and identities through stories. Coined by researcher Jonathan Gottschall, this concept highlights how, similar to needing food or sleep, human brains constantly construct narratives to find meaning, manage uncertainty, and make sense of a complex world.
Key aspects of this phenomenon include:
The Narrative Brain: Our minds are "narrative engines" that prefer coherent stories over raw facts, often rationalizing beliefs after they are formed by stories.
Self-Stories: Humans construct personal narratives that shape their inner lives and happiness, which can be either beneficial or toxic.
Function of Stories: Stories serve as life simulators, helping humans navigate social challenges and understand moral lessons.
Impact: Storytelling infiltrates all aspects of life, influencing empathy, behavior, and social change, but can also lead to misinterpretations of reality, such as in propaganda or conspiracies.
The stories we tell ourselves about ourselves can be either helpful or unhelpful.
In psychology, this concept is known as narrative identity—the internalized, evolving story you construct to make sense of your life. Research shows that these stories are more than just reflections of the past; they act as a "filter" that dictates how you interpret the present and predict your future.
1. Helpful Stories: The "Redemptive" Narrative
Helpful stories typically follow a redemption sequence, where a person experiences a challenge but concludes with a positive insight, growth, or transformation.
Key Traits:
Agency: You see yourself as the "author" or protagonist in control of your choices rather than a passive victim of circumstances.
Communion: The story emphasizes your connection to others and a sense of belonging.
Growth Mindset: Failures are framed as "learning opportunities" rather than permanent flaws.
Impact: Higher levels of mental well-being, life satisfaction, and psychological resilience.
2. Unhelpful Stories: The "Contamination" Narrative
Unhelpful stories often follow a contamination sequence, where positive events are ruined by negative outcomes, or the story emphasizes permanent, unchangeable limitations.
Key Traits:
Cognitive Distortions: Includes "black-and-white thinking" (everything is a failure) or "personalization" (blaming yourself for things outside your control).
Victimhood: Framing yourself as powerless against external forces.
The "Never" Loop: Using absolute language like "I'll never be good enough" or "I always mess up".
Impact: Strongly associated with higher rates of depression, anxiety, and self-sabotage.
How to Edit Your Story
You can shift your narrative through intentional effort:
Notice the Script: Identify the recurring phrases in your "inner radio station".
Challenge the Facts: Ask yourself, "Is there evidence for this story, or is it a cognitive distortion?".
Rewrite the Ending: Reframing a "failure" into a "pivot" can change your brain's connectivity and improve decision-making.
Practice Agency: Focus on small actions you can control to reinforce your role as the protagonist.
Our self-stories significantly determine our well-being, happiness, and future.
It’s a powerful truth: we are essentially "storytelling animals" who constantly narrate our own existence. This internal narrative, or narrative identity, serves as a psychological lens that filters how we process the past and project into the future.
Here is how these self-stories fundamentally impact your life:
Determining Well-Being: Narrative psychologists like Dan McAdams have found that mental health is deeply linked to two themes: agency (feeling in control of your actions) and redemption (finding positive meaning in past challenges).
Predicting the Future: Your self-story acts as an "ongoing psychological suggestion". If you view yourself as a "flawed hero" overcoming obstacles, you are statistically more likely to report higher life satisfaction and resilience.
Shaping Reality: Research by James Pennebaker on expressive writing suggests that the act of "storifying" experiences—turning raw events into a coherent narrative—is therapeutic and improves physical health.
The Trap of Toxic Narratives: Conversely, unhelpful stories often follow patterns of "contamination" (where good things are ruined by bad ones) or "futility," which can lead to self-blaming and stagnation.
The most liberating part? These stories aren't fixed. You can use metacognitive tools and "autobiographical reasoning" to edit your past and reshape your future outlook.
What is one recurring "story" you tell yourself about your biggest challenge?
It is possible to change our self-stories by using metacognitive tools and recalibrating our attention.
Yes, it is entirely possible to change your self-stories by using metacognitive toolsand attention recalibration. Research in narrative psychology and metacognitive therapy shows that while our stories shape us, we have the agency to reshape those stories by becoming more discerning "narrators" of our own lives.
Metacognitive Tools for Story Change
Metacognition is "thinking about your thinking". By stepping back from your thoughts, you can view them as constructions rather than immutable truths.
Self-Questioning: Challenge the validity of your narratives by asking: "What evidence am I highlighting, and what am I ignoring?" or "What would a fairer, fuller interpretation look like?".
Thought Journaling: Use a throught journal to track recurring patterns. Writing helps subconscious assumptions emerge, allowing you to choose how to respond rather than reacting instinctually.
Mindfulness Meditation: This practice increases awareness of thoughts in the present moment, helping you observe and let go of unhelpful mental patterns without judgment.
Externalization: A technique from narrative therapy where you separate yourself from the problem (e.g., viewing "Anxiety" as an external influence rather than an intrinsic trait).
Recalibrating Your Attention
Recalibration involves intentionally shifting your mental "spotlight" to different parts of your experience.
Accessing New Memories: Instead of focusing only on failures, deliberately recall "unique outcomes"—times when you overcame difficulties or acted contrary to a negative self-perception.
Reframing Judgments: You can learn to re-author your story by focusing on gains rather than gaps, identifying strengths and resilience that grew out of past hardships.
Multiple Retellings: Try retelling a story from different perspectives—first as a victim, then as an empowered agent. This forces a shift in perspective and highlights how much of our "truth" is based on where we choose to place our attention.
By consistently applying these metacognitive strategies, you can loosen the grip of self-blaming interpretations and build a more flexible, supportive self-identity.
Do you have a specific self-story or recurring pattern you’re looking to reframe right now?
Warriors for Life (WFL) Online "Awaken Your Inner Healer!" edition presented by Victory for Veterans, Inc. (VFV) - Monday (TONIGHT), February 16, 2026 @ 4:30 PM PT, 5:30 PM MT, 6:30 PM CT, & 7:30 PM ET
Join Zoom Meeting: https://us06web.zoom.us/j/86121340012
Thank you,
Kirk Poe, Certified Peer Support Specialist, Reiki Master, Certified Body/Emotion/Belief Code Practitioner, & Volunteer Facilitator, Victory for Veterans, Inc. (VFV)